Malaysia Here in my home

A good friend of mine keeps me informed regularly on the Malaysian Politics. In recent years, the political unity in this country has come underfire. Many factions within the ruling party broke apart and formed their own opposition parties. The culmination of this had brought about surprising results in last year's General Election. The ruling party is losing the support of the people. Its support is further tainted by racial unrest, unexplained unresolved corruption even crimes stories involving political figures. All of these probably costs Malaysia a great deal and had brought the state to where it is today.

I get amazed each time with a new story about outrageous things that the Malaysian politicians do or get involved in. The recent incident at the Perak State Assembly shocked me quite a bit. There was a total chaos in the assembly and when the speaker tried to call for order, he was sidelined and forced out by a handful of politicians. These politicians proceeded to elect their own Speaker whilst the former Speaker was still present in his seat. There were much scuffling and the Speaker was in a tug of war - the Opposition party wanted him to stay but the Ruling Party was pulling him to leave. Now it seemed the Perak State of Assembly is dissolved and they are deciding what is next. The Youtube video on this subject would give a gist of this fiasco. A write-up in the news provided some clues http://malaysia.news.yahoo.com/bnm/20090507/tts-perak-tarnished-roundup-bm-993ba14.html

It is sad for me to watch this and the democratic process is not even honoured by the people whose been elected to uphold the very same thing. Had it always happen in the past and only now I am aware of it? Probably not. Otherwise how could the country come to this sort of state is it now? Disunity - that is the word for it.

Not all hope is lost I pray. After watching what the common Malaysians are trying to do, there is another movement calling for unity. I only hope this movement will give others hope just like it did for me. I sincerely wish the good defeats the evil in this situation. I am doing my bit to spread the word.

Watch this YouTube video of a song named "Here in my home" calling out for unity amongst all races to live together. It claims the road is long, we are on stony ground. But if we have one love undivided - the love of Malaysia as our home, that's what it is really all about.

Watch out for the rappers, special!!

Grant me a moment of clarity

I have been obsessive with the fertility business since I started my IVF treatment in February. When the first cycle failed, I was determined to do whatever I can to increase the chances of the second cycle. When Dr Lynn said acupuncture helps, I went full on when I was back home in Malaysia. I visited a TCM doctor for acupuncture, cupping and massage on a daily basis. I spoke with everyone what I was going through and out of good intentions, everyone had their opinions on what, how, why, which, when. My head was full of ideas or were they really distractions??
When I came back, Melbourne weather experienced a cold snap. On last Wednesday, the morning temperature fell to a low 3 degrees Celsius in autumn, the Bureau of Meterology claimed it was the coolest April morning in 56 years. My body did not take it well. I wasnt exactly sick but it wasnt right. I wanted to change my diet, I wanted to find a reliable TCM doctor and at the same time, I was on my second IVF cycle of injections. My actions, to say the least, were frantic and I found myself going in circles. My other half was so concerned that he wanted me to stop the injections. I almost went out of mind. Whether what was to happen next is my own doing or some other cause, my body did not respond to the injections.

Last Friday on the fourth day of my FSH (Gonal brand) injections, my ultrasound showed I had only one big follicle and my doctor told me I had to abandon the cycle as more follicles/ eggs are expected to continue with the treatment. No egg collection, no embryo, no transfer, no pregnancy, no child. I wasnt dissapointed, I was very tired. Tired of what I made my body to do. Vigorous trials of this and that to make me fertile or pregnant. Eager turned obsessive cant be good. It's time to return to basics. Return to clarity. Tonight this is my prayer:

My inner light guides me through the pathway of my life,
Whole and at one;
I raise my eyes to see all and understand,
Where and how;
To place each foot forward.

A prayer that a naturopath student taught at the Australian College of Natural Medicine.
Photo taken from the Cream Trip on the Bay of Islands, NZ.